Going Sailing - Connection Made

The sailing race for us began in Hong Kong; which does not speak the same Pu Tong Hua language that is spoken in Beijing. While the written script is all the same (Traditional and Simplified), the spoken language is completely different.
During my visit to Hong Kong, the inability of the locals to speak Pu Tong Hua was ... infuriating! I found that I was annoyed at being in a part of China (just let me say this for argument's sake) and not being able to use the Chinese that I have worked so hard to learn. I know that I could have switched to English (with difficulty) but I wanted/expected to speak Chinese!
What did I learn? I have integrated into Local Chinese society much more than I had realized. It kind of sneaks up on you. I can manage to function in Beijing in a way that is impossible in Hong Kong. Although infuriating, I became much more aware of how easily I can move through life in Beijing with my (admittedly poor) Chinese. Sometimes you need to break a connection in order to realize how strong it has become.

Seeds of Change

Cue Scene:
Western Man (WM) and Chinese Girlfriend (CG) are walking hand-in-hand near around Hou Hai Lake in Beijing.  Sun is shining but near the horizon.  They are enjoying the romantic atmosphere around the lake.

CG asks WM to buy her a lotus pod.  WM looks at the lotus pods.  He decides it's the right moment to buy her a flower (or flower bud) to improve the romantic nature of the walk.

WM completes the bargaining and returns with a lotus pod.  WM is happy that he bargained the price down to 4 yuan and at the smile on CG's face.

CG and WM walk for a few more minutes in happy bliss. CG then rips apart the lotus pod and eats the seeds.

WM is shell-shocked and wondering if he should bring attention to this bizzarre behavior.  He has never had a girl eat a rose or bouquet of flowers.
:Cut Scene
-----

This scene has happened hundreds of times in Beijing (I know these WM!).  One of the many snacks you can buy near the lake is the humble (and super-tasty) lotus pod (full of edible lotus seeds).  Most westerners have never seen these lotus pods.  It's quite shocking for them to realize that the pretty flower given to a pretty girl is suddenly in the process of being consumed.

The Toilet Blues

With the Olympics in Beijing, everyone expects a post about toilets.  Here's mine.  At my company, we had nice, normal white urinals of a fairly normal design.  They were the same as any urinals anywhere and they worked quite well.

I also own a lot of pants and I try to keep them neat and clean (the segue is not as jarring if you read on).  Recently, I began to notice that all my pants were starting to get a couple of small blue dots at the mid-to-lower thigh region.  I couldn't figure out where they were coming from.  They washed out just fine but I still couldn't trace the source.

Recently (as well), the company had been getting some complaints about the smell in the bathroom.  Being quite responsive, they started putting those small, blue urinal cakes in the urinals (see where I'm going with this?).  Great idea, no more smell.  Unfortunately, they didn't include the all important "urinal cake holder" that you see in the west... It's really important.

Urinals are designed to avoid splashing and spraying (especially back onto the user).  It's a solved problem.  They are designed with smooth curves and no hard corners.  Unfortunately, by adding the urinal cakes without their holders, we've now got some hard corners that seem to promote back-spatter.  Add the fact that their blue, and you've got the makings of a real problem (at least for me).  The urinal cake holders are designed to slightly elevate the cake and dissapate the force of the liquid (thus reducing the spatter that could cause problems).

I'm currently contemplating how to raise this issue to my company in the most formal manner possible without opening myself up to ridicule and shame.  It surely isn't possible that I'm the only one that's had a problem with this, is it?

P.S. - I've managed to fix the problem for myself by changing my ... uh ... behavior and positioning.

Shiny on the Outside - Opening Ceremonies

Alas, another negative comment about the opening ceremonies. :(  I just hate to do this but it really irritates me.

There was a great section of the ceremonies where a 9 year-old girl sang in front of the entire stadium.  It was great singing and it was impressive to see that from such a young person in such a high pressure setting.  Everyone was amazed.  Turns out that it was also a fabrication. *grumble*

Apparently, the little girl (7 years old) that endured to the end of the singing contests and was chosen for having the best voice and ability was axed at the last minute because she wasn't cute enough.  They replaced her with another girl (of undeniable cuteness) and in a great injustice, had the original girl's voice be the one that was broadcast throughtout the stadium (and the world). Turns out that this was just another lip-syncing effort like so many other singers in the past.

The Chinese say that they had their reasons for this but I don't agree.  Packaged performances (like movies, etc.) are known to be "constructed" to provide the best possible experience.  Live performances are invogorating and astonishing because they happen in real life.  The reality (and integrity) are part of the what makes them appealing to people.  Without that feeling of authenticity, there's no reason to enjoy these events in person.  Just give me a movie and tell me it's a movie.  Don't "pretend" you've given me authenticity.

Of course, the whole notion of authenticity may be out-dated and it's certainly not an overriding concern in China.  On a variety of levels, China operates under the assumption that if it looks the same on the outside, then it must work the same on the inside.  Much of the miracle of China is built on this assumption and rest assured, all gilded ages (and cultures) have eventually collapsed under the weight of the facades they build up.  Just because it's shiny on the outside doesn't mean it isn't rotting underneath.

Dance, Dance, Dance

No, this is not a reference to Haruki Murakami's mesmirising book.  There are things about Beijing that visitors may not see (or understand) and I want to make sure some of them come up here.  Does it mean that everything in Beijing is great? No!  But it does mean that you can fall in love with Beijing despite all of the negative things that sometimes appear.

On almost any summer night, you can go around Beijing and many of the open areas, parks or playgrounds are covered with middle-aged and elderly couples engaged in ... dance and dance.  Usually it's western ballroom dance but sometimes you can find taichi or other, more synchronized practice sessions.

As a westerner (yes, Indians are also westerners here), I didn't "get it" at first.  I appreciated it but then I asked a local about who organizes all of these dance sessions.  They looked at me strangely and didn't even understand the question.  I pressed on, "Does the government organize these sessions or the local neighborhood committees or ... who?"  The answer: The sessions are completely spontaneous, nobody organizes them!

It just happens when someone with a big jukebox (maybe with exernal speakers) runs a power line and then just starts playing music.  Someone will come and offer to lead the groups and then everyone will just start dancing.  The skill level isn't too high but ... who cares?  It's a beautiful thing to see and everyone/anyone can join in without worrying about payment or embarrassment.  People do have some "fees" to cover costs but they are so low that it makes the dancing almost free and doesn't hinder one-time visitors from just joining without thinking about it.

I have never seen something like this anywhere else.  Sure, there are sometimes outdoor dancing sessions in other cities but they are always so organized and transitory.  This is just a reflection of the desire of the local people to be outside in the evening and dance until the sun goes down.  What could be better?

Not Sold Here - Butter Dish

China is a modern country (like many others).  As a world(ly) person, I know that almost anything I really need, I'll be able to find.  It might be a little bit different but it will serve the same purpose.  Anything that really isn't available is usually because of some cultural bias (the locals don't like things like that) or just a pure oversight (the locals never realized they needed something like that).  Maybe this will be come a series of posts about what these unavailable things are.  For now, I have 2 items to share.

The Ice Cube Tray - The ice cube trays in China are just junk.  You can visit high-end apartments, low-end huts, local vendors and luxury department stores.  They are all the same.  I searched and searched and eventually had to bring ice cube trays from the US.  Someone said that it was probably because people don't use ice very much so they don't need good trays.  I'm not sure I believe this.  This is definitely a case where people just don't know how much their ice cube trays suck.  I have people visit and when they use the imported trays (imported? hah, they're probably still made here) they are astonished at how well they work.

The Butter Dish - You can look all over this great city and you will not find a proper butter dish anywhere.  Apparently, Chinese people don't need butter dishes.  I can't even find them in the imported goods stores!  Actually, this wouldn't bother me so much if they didn't also sell sticks of butter at all the supermarkets (what do they do with the butter sticks?).  For now, I've been using a plastic soap container (meant for the soap bars in the bathroom).  The humanity...

Your Safety is Our Top Concern

My first post about the Olympics in Beijing isn't about what I had planned.  The United States experienced it's first death at the Olympics in Beijing and I feel honor-bound to provide some small defense for Beijing.  I can't imagine what it must be like for a family to go to the Olympics on vacation and then suddenly be the victims for such a random (and deadly) attack.  It's enough to bring you to tears.  However, Beijing shouldn't be tarnished with a broad brush as a result of this incident.

Bejing is one of the safest cities of its size anywhere in the world (if not the safest).  The level of safety here is surreal.  I have never felt any danger or worries in any part of the city at any time of day.  It's not just because I'm a man.  Women as well say that they feel so free in Beijing because they can move around the city alone without worry.

This incident unfortunately casts a pall over one of Beijng's best (and most subtle) features.  I can't imagine a city of 20 million people in which people live in such safety.  I can't even imagine a city of 500,000 people with this kind of safety.

Interestingly, the most danger I have felt was in the expat sections of town in a bar/restaurant district.  Predictably, it was a bar fight atmosphere that left me quite shaken because it was so ... unexpected in Beijing.  Anyway, just to put in my two cents.

At the Beach - You Can't Even Come Here!

  Time for part 2 of the trip to the beach. You know that I had some troubles in getting a hotel room but I had it easy. Check out what happened next. Also, please note that in the interest of not getting c3ns0r3d by the gubirnment, I've changed some spellings and names. I'm not stupid, just careful.
 
2. Non-H@n Ch!nese not allowed

  Of greater concern was the following comment by some members of the group: "It's a good thing none of us are minorities." I asked what they meant but knew enough not to push the issue right away (in front of the hotel staff). However, I had already decided this would be topic of conversation at lunch.

  Turns out that if you're not a member of the majority H@n ethnic community in Ch!n@, you can't even visit this area without permission from the local government. There is nothing that special about this area. In the US, it would be equivalent to saying that only white people could visit Venice Beach without prior approval. My friends indicated that it was probably just a formality and that it wasn't really that big a deal to get the required permission.  I'm not sure that mitigates the situation.

  [Background voice]: "But, how do they know if you're H@n ch!n3se?"

  How do they know, you ask? I wondered as well. Turns out the national ID cards actually have a section that lists what ethnic minority you belong to (!).  This idea would go over like a lead balloon in the US.  There is an official list of ethnic minorities and everyone has to fit into one of these categories (I imagine you couldn't get an ID card otherwise).

  This restriction was a surprise to many of my local friends. They reasoned that perhaps some of it was because of security precautions (and you know what scoundrels those ethnic minorities can be). I'm just astonished. This indicates "levels" of citizenship based on ethnic affiliation. I know Ch!n@ has some issues related to its ethnic minorities but the fastest way to keep a people from identifying with their country is to make sure that their affiliation is used in silly manners such as this. While the US has it's own problems relating to race, it doesn't have policies so blatant about segregating people. Maybe it works here but it doesn't fit my world view.

  Even in India where you have ethnic-based rebellions (with armies and everything), people's movements weren't officially restricted by the government based on ethnicity. Heck, at one time, the Prime Minister's whole security detail was composed of people from an ethnicity that was in open rebellion.  That would be like Who ZhinDao (get it?) being protected by SinZhiang Muslims.  Granted, India's Prime Minister was eventually assassinated by her security detail but it was the thought that counted.

At the Beach - You Can't Stay Here

 Recently, I visited a seaside resort near Beijing (okay, resort is a strong word, but you get my meaning). The place was quite nice. Hotels, restaurants, beach, entertainment, almost everything you would need... almost. This is the first in a three-part series covering the events of that weekend that might be of interest. I promise, they are all quick and informative.

  I went there with 7 other local Chinese. It was one of those weekend trips where you look forward to acting silly, having fun on the beach, eating too much and generally raising hell.

Story #1:

  Standard procedure. You arrive at location and look around for hotels. Seems easy, no? At the first hotel we went to, we starting asking about rooms, etc.  Upon seeing me, the hotel staff emphatically said that foreigners weren't allowed to stay at that hotel and we had to leave. "Odd", I thought,"but oh well, we'll go somewhere else."

  We then moved to hotel #2. This hotel seemed nicer and they also started to talk about rooms and options. Upon realizing that I was with the group, they also suddenly stopped the negotiations and insisted that we would have to stay elsewhere (actually, they were insisting that I should stay elsewhere). My friends were nice enough to close ranks with me.

  Turns out that none of the hotels in this area had "licenses" allowing them to have foreigners as guests. I never realized before. Hotels in China apparently need to apply for a special license in order to accept foreign guests. The cover story is that the government is trying to ensure that an appropriate level of quality is maintained for foreigners (I have already stayed in some horrendous hotels that were more than happy to have me as a guest).

  I suspect the real reason is to fleece the hotels for the costs of another "license". Since this area doesn't currently have many (any?) foreign visitors, there's no reason to apply for the license. I don't care if the government tries to track my movements by making hotels report all foreign guests but I don't like being told that certain hotels are off-limits. Regardless, after my friends begged and swore to the management that I wouldn't cause trouble (What? Me cause trouble? Never!), they relented and allowed me to stay.

  Lesson learned: Always take a tent with you on trips in case you're forced to camp outside.

 As you'll find out in the next story, I had it easy compared to other Chinese citizens who wanted to visit the area.

The Spirit of Thanksgiving

The United States has an image problem.  No, not the obivous one thanks to the current president, but the cultural one.  People all over the world think of Americans as materialistic, greedy people who, as a by-product, generally manufacture holidays in order to bolster consumer spending through gift-giving.  While that may be true in general, there are some notable exceptions to these materialistic holidays.  Thanksgiving is still one of the purest holidays which revolves around the simple pleasure of just spending a full day with family and friends while focusing on food and television and understanding what things you are thankful for.
The Chinese seem to understand this once you connect it to their Mid-Autumn Festival.  This festival is the one festival of the year where everyone struggles to be with family and friends (or at least, wishes strongly that they were).  In many ways, it's similar in theme and execution to Thanksgiving.
Europeans?  For all of their high-and-mighty, we-are-cultured attitude, their faces go absolutely blank when faced with the concept of Thanksgiving.  Common responses, "What, no gifts?" "But then, why do you have the holiday?" "What are you supposed to do all day?" "It's just about hanging out with family and friends?" "I don't get it." "But... what is it about?"
Attempts to explain are usually lost until it finally dawns on them that ... that's it.  There's no more to find out about.  It's just about enjoying a day and giving thanks (to any diety or just your visible companions) for what you have.  I, for one, have come to feel a stronger connection to Thanksgiving as my time away from the United States has increased.

How Do You Spell Napkin? Hint: It's not K-L-E-E-N-E-X

As a nation, China has some idiosyncracies that I have never seen anywhere else. I guess all nations have their own cultural biases but I'm only sensitive to the Chinese ones right now. Chinese people and institutions seem to insist that kleenex and toilet paper serve the exact same role in personal hygiene as the paper napkin. Read it again ... understand the problem?

Time and time again, I find myself making do with kleenex when what I really need is a nice, strong napkin. Those of us with a 5 o'clock shadow know that using kleenex to wipe your face usually results in a pile of shredded paper (and a dirty face, to boot). There is a reason that a paper napkin is built differently from kleenex tissues.

I've tried to make this apparent to the locals I head out with but their initial stare is usually one of complete bewilderment. They'll say, "But there's already tissues on the table." After a bit of explanation, they'll look at me with a tentative,"Oh... I guess I see." Anyway, please do what you can to help the situation. I've shredded enough tissue paper on my face for one lifetime.

Maximizing Profits - Chinese Kama Sutra

Let's start with some background information. The Kama Sutra is not an Indian sex manual. Mostly, it's a treatise on how Indian women should behave in order to maximize their profits when separating a man from his money (my favourite line:"After spending all of a man's money, leave him for some time so that he can rebuild his fortune for the next time you see him."). In the same vein, many expats in Beijing have noted that prevalence of pot-bellied expat men who always have hot, young Chinese women hanging on their arms.
I've always assumed (along with many other expats) that this was the classic situation where the pretty young things are using their beauty and looks to attract men who are (relatively) rich and either drain them of their accounts or marry them and hope for a much better life (of course, this is repeated around the world). It seems like the best option for them to accomplish their goals.
I was recently talking to a Chinese friend of mine who ... well ... is in a position to know about these things and the subject came up. She told me that I was completely wrong and the women who go after the foreign men are fools and not part of the norm. Why? Apparently, there are a lot more rich Chinese men then rich foreign men. Beyond that, the rich Chinese are a lot more ... generous with their money and present much better prospects for long-term financial gain. Those women chasing after foreign men don't really know what they're doing and will have a lot of hard lessons ahead of them.
Never thought about it myself. To my eyes, I only see the obvious examples of older expat men and young Chinese ladies because it's obvious (and slightly distasteful). I guess I wouldn't really notice the dynamic of rich Chinese men and young Chinese women. I will confirm that there are a lot more rich Chinese than people realize. In a city like Beijing, I can pretend that I'm part of the well-off crowd (and I am, really) but the world above me is a lot larger than I can even imagine.
This is yet another lesson of how I can't really trust my own senses when it comes to understanding Chinese culture. The world I see is a tiny slice of the real world in China and without more time (and more guides), I'll forever be stuck with my expat-tainted view. Just because I see a pattern doesn't mean that it has any relationship to the Truth.